Mary and Bella, feline cold war.

cat
” I was here first.”

Mary:

I was happy as an only cat for years.  I had my mom to myself and when she could tear herself away from me and I was provided with, Amy a pretty good substitute servant.  I like her because she appreciates my need for treats and a lap.  Then the unthinkable happened.  Bella, another cat (and her human-training them is so hard) moved in.  We disliked each other immediately.  It was MY house, she did not belong and I made that clear, but my efforts were in vain, she’s still here.

cat
“I like it here, except for Mary.”

 

Bella:

Moving is very stressful for me but once we settled into our new home I made myself comfortable and began a campaign to rid myself of Mary.  I thought this would be simple, she’s kind of soft, always playing sweet to the humans, never putting them in their place.  Humans require intensive training and follow up sessions on a regular basis to remind them who is in charge.  This includes but is not limited to swatting and hissing in the middle of a required adoration session to keep them on their toes.  This is sometimes followed up by allowing more affection immediately or simply walking away.  You have to keep them guessing.  The same tactics, modified to terrorize a cat, were be employed for my Rid the House of Mary Campaign”.  Thus far this has only resulted in much hissing and growling the humans discourage for some reason.

 

Mary and Bella:

This battle for dominence continued until the most unthinkable thing in the world happened:

 

 

Labrador retriever
“My name’s Millie and I love my new home.”

 

 

Desperate times call for desperate measures.  Our out and out war had to be altered to a cold war, allowing us to join forces occasionally in a covert operation to rid our home of this vile creature.  We have tried everything from blaming any and every thing the humans dislike on the dog, ignoring the humans as punishment and attacks on the enemy.  Alas, we are still at war but considering that cat’s are far superior to dogs, we will eventually prevail.

Until we do we now look forward to our humans leaving because the dog leaves too.  Training Amy the substitute is an ongoing process but she’s preferable to the dog.

 

Bella the calico cat
“It’s exhausting being a cat.”

 

Mary the cat gettin gpets
“Lap time with Amy.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cats’ Emails to Their Humans on a Weekend Away

These Happy Critters were abandoned to my care for the first time.  This is what they had to say to their humans via email.

Correspondence shown in maroon are letters received from the Cats to the Humans.

Correspondence shown in black are letters received from the Humans to the cats.

Notes in blue are from the Pet Sitter (aka. Substitute Mom).

"Your really left us?"

Dear humans who have apparently abandoned us,

The substitute showed up, so that’s a good start. She tended to our needs as instructed under jimi and Simons supervision. We all graced her with a chance to pet us then ignored her, as a substitute deserves.

Your cats.

(they become much more affectionate with the substitute very quickly!  I was glad to see everyone. All is well here, unless you’re an “abandoned” cat that is)

Dear Substitute Mom,

All of us humans were very happy to hear from our kitty friends.

We arrived here a little later than we planned 6 humans need more breaks than the 1 puppy.

All the owners especially Jimis’ much appreciated update and can see he is in good hands

Thanks

"We aren't being fed at all."

Abandonment Day 2:

To the humans on probation,

(Henry is the spokes cat) Mila, Jimi and I greeted the substitute. Yes, she gave us pets and Simon finally intruded on that but we are being starved!  Jimi is having great time chasing Simon. The rest of us are bored.

The Cats

"We are not getting any affection and it's very stressful."

Abandonment Day 3:

We are under a lot of stress right now. That’s all we can say

It was a stressful day for all of us too…. we’re hoping tomorrow is a better day

We miss you all too

"If she trips and breaks something she won't be able to leave."

Abandonment Day 4:

Well, the substitute is quite trainable so she is acceptable. Feeding the birds is a waste of OUR time though.

"I don't like her at all."

Last Day!

Ok, the sub can be used again. That is if you can bear to leave us again, which is unfathomable to us.

 

"Ok, you can let her care for us again."

 

We appreciate the great care you gave the kitty crowd… They were missed.

Cricket-Back in Sunny California

 

My review of Amy’s Happy Critters, Inc. long term “care” facility – By The Cricket

"I'm so happy to be home, I promise to be the best cat I can be from now on."

I was banished from my natural habitat of Santa Monica, California to Mooresville, Indiana from the summer of  2010 to January 2011.  Where is that you may ask?  What an excellent question.  If you google anything “Mooresville” you are directed to Mooresville, North Carolina.  I can only assume this is because North Carolina has a climate suitable for feline habitation unlike Mooresville Indiana.  Since I am a mature feline of unparalleled patience with a heart that is far to big for my own good, I allowed the caretaker who abandoned me in the back of beyond to resume her duties providing my very modest care requirements.  Also, she seems to have freed me from the arctic with no time to spare.  Apparently the weather there can actually be worse then the horrors I experienced during my incarceration.  Plus, the substitute servant added yet another dog to the house which was already overrun with pets that were not me.

"This is not California. I wonder if I'll be left behind in Kansas City, Missouri now?"

The trip back to my natural habitat was not quite as harrowing as the banishment experience as a whole.  There was a moment in transit where I feared being left behind in the dreaded Midwest again.  I was forced to wear the harness and stuffed in to a box that fits under an airplane seat.  Humiliating, not to mention uncomfortable.

About Amy and her pet “care” facility;  the bathroom was spacious but only cleaned once a day, the beds were suitable, the food was edible but the portions were paltry – I nearly starved, the view was nice once the staff placed my heated bed in the window and put an entertainment center (bird feeder) on the roof outside of my window.  As I have tried to make clear, the weather is appalling, horrible, unsuitable for felines, depressing and generally unacceptable but, I did have access to considerably more square footage then I ever have in California.  Of course I could only access the entire facility when the dogs were confined at night and I had to fight off Monkey and Domino, aka The Black Devils, most nights but a girl needs a little excitement from time to time and they are wimps.  Domino doesn’t even know how to hiss!

In short, should the small box that serves the sadistic purpose of cat transport container come into view again, I am NOT GETTING IN IT. I have no intention of leaving Santa Monica ever again, not even for more square footage.  If my substitute servant, Amy, would care to preform her duties here where the the sun shines and water does not freeze I will hire her.

"Aren't' you going to fill the food bowl? Did you loose your watch or something?"

 

Teddy is a Champ, in More then One Sense!

Teddy doing yoga

"My yoga practice helps me to maintain my flexibility."

I am one of two dogs in my household, the youngest and by far the most handsome, in my opinion.  Apparently some dogs like to give their Report Card together but I would like to speak on my own.

Amy has been my pet sitter since I was a cute little puppy.  She does the same thing each day when she arrives which I very much appreciate as routine is an important part of my life.  She does not try to brush me which is nice.  I do require belly rubs before exiting my crate and she gives me some, but not nearly enough despite the fact that I refuse to come out of my crate until she ignores me.  At this point I’d just as soon join my brother Casey in the yard.  I think she wastes time cleaning the cat boxes while we are outside which seems pointless.  Then the good stuff starts.  We get to walk!  Since I prefer to avoid the tile she is very accommodating and sticks to the carpet.  We have a brisk walk but there is not enough time to mark everything that requires it which is a bit frustrating at times.  My brother doesn’t like the heat and we don’t like to be separated so when it is to hot or to cold we get to play games indoors.  She gets out our puzzles and makes us hunt for treats.  We are very smart so it doesn’t take long to solve them but it is still fun! (Pet Sitter Note: Buy puzzle toys here)

Ch. Marnus Clearing the Bases

I used to go to big buildings just full of other dogs – oh the smells!  I apparently had a job of some sort, but all I ever did was trot around a ring, get hot dogs then have some new person pet me all over.  I love hot dogs, I was often able to sneak extra ones since humans are easily distracted.  The brushing was way over the top in these buildings but all in all it was worth it.  I don’t do this anymore.  I am some sort of ABC, AKC, ARC champion now and have finished my job.  I love home but sometimes I miss the smells and especially the hot dogs.

We’ve had other sitters and they have been just fine but I really like that Amy sticks to our routine though I wish she wouldn’t wast time with the cats and a hotdog now and then might be nice…….

Deano has specific requests

Deano before walking
Did you know she makes me wear this thing too?

My mom saved me from large building full of cages that were filled with lots of barking dogs.  I had a very painful wound on my leg so she was just supposed to keep me until I was better and a real home could be found but, I was so charming I was able to stick around for good.  As my mom put it, “he just sort of never left.”

I like things done the right way.  Putting that thing on me is not the right way but both Amy and my human insist on it and, since it seems to be required for a walk, I put up with it.  I like to walk briskly with many stops to sniff and mark.  Amy won’t let me mark all of the flowers and garbage cans that require it and this is very frustrating.  We do move fast when I want to though.  After my walk I require a few minutes in the yard.  I had to make this very clear to Amy as she just didn’t understand that this had to be part of our time together.  Fresh water is required each visit but she seemed to know this one, very odd for a human to be so well trained, but don’t look a gift human in the mouth.  Petting is another thing she gets right.  I particularly like it when she sits on the porch steps and I get to lean against her for pets and a hug or two.  It’s another thing that, oddly, required very little training.  All in all since she’s the only pet sitter I’ve ever had, I guess she does a good job.

Mr. Man aka "Missa" smiling to the end.

Pet Sitter Note: Missa was lost to cancer in May 2010.  Tragically Utley was lost to cancer as well a couple of months later.  Both boys lived, long full lives filled with of love and all the doggie fun they could ask for.  It has been a dificult year for Deano and his human but I think they are a great comfort to one another.
All three dogs were adopted from The Humane Society of Indianapolis (HSI) Deano’s human has been a valuable and dedicated foster parent to HSI for years.  It’s always lots of fun to see just who will be waiting for me at Deano’s house!
Deano and Utley morning the passing of Missa

Deano with his brother Utley mourning the recent loss of their other brother, Mr. Man, aka "Missa"

Ziggy has his say, twice it seems

Ziggy on a cold weather walk

We walk in almost all weather

Ziggy’s say as dictated to his mom:

“To Whom It May Concern,

My Name is Ziggy and I am an adorable 4 year old miniature poodle (if I do say so, myself).  Amy’s Happy Critters, Inc. has been walking me 7 days a week for over 3 years.  Amy, herself, comes every day, no matter what the weather is, and takes me for a vigorous stroll.  Some days when my owner, … is very busy and can’t be home, she gives me my food.  When Amy’s not going to be available, she makes arrangements to have someone capable come and visit me.

I really love Amy, especially when she calls me Handsome, and look forward to seeing her every day.  She’s extremely dependable, kindhearted and we always have a good time together.  If you’re considering hiring someone to pet sit or exercise your pet, I don’t believe you could find anyone better than Amy. …”

Ziggy’s report card: Ok, my mom sort of pulled the above statement out of me before serving lunch, I couldn’t help myself.  We do walk in almost all weather but that’s not always a good thing in my  opinion.  I have very delicate feet, snow can be a bit to cold for them.  At least she has the sense to not walk me when it’s salty.  In the summer though, we have a great time.  We see deer and all other types of invaders to my space.  I chase them all away of course.

But I guess this is a report on her, not me, unfortunately.  Humans in general just don’t move fast enough but she does her best.  She even runs up the steps sometimes, but not nearly often enough or fast enough. (pet sitter’s note: it’s 70 steps landscaped into the side of a steep ravine, he has four feet and is a bit younger then I am!)  I do get to chase the wildlife away but I am discouraged from challenging invading dogs for some reason.  Unfortunately, despite how slow she is in general, she’s often fast enough to keep me from getting tasty tidbits like dead mice.  She allows the neighborhood humans to admire me, which is appropriate.  I do very much enjoy our walks along the Monon when I stay at the kennel.  All in all, she is pretty good at her job, despite the fact she is never quick enough with my lunch.

Molly and Gunner Proclaim, “Walks are required”

 

Molly and Gunner in the snow

"We walk in all weather"

 

Miss Amy (as we have been taught to call her) has been our dog walker for several years.  She isn’t all bad.  We, of course, prefer our humans but considering the options; no walk or a walk with Amy, we will choose walking any time.  She usually goes plenty fast except in the snow, she’s sort of slow for some reason.
Molly has her say: I am not crazy about new people, it’s not that I am scared, it’s just that strange people should be considered very carefully for many reasons.  When my mom rescued me I was scared but I was young then, I have matured quite a bit.  Miss Amy  was a suspicious character at first but I couldn’t resist pets when she sat on the couch giving them to Gunner and not me.  All he really cares about is treats anyway.  She takes us on nice walks, I don’t really care to walk away from home, what if it’s not there when I get back?  I do enjoy when we turn towards home though.  My nice warm bed, that the humans insist on invading, is there waiting for me.
Molly at home

Molly waiting for her humans.

Gunner’s Perspective: Miss Amy was my dog walker long before I allowed Molly to join the household.  I did all of the training, of both Molly and Miss Amy.  I wait at the window when I hear her car but sometimes she’s tricky and shows up in the wrong car.  This necessitates the defense of the house becoming the priority until she is identified.  She gives me treats but not nearly enough.  I don’t know what our humans have told her but I do need lots of treats, protecting the house is a job that takes a lot of energy and it deserves a lot of rewards.  I even protect the cats, though I can’t see their usefulness to the household defenses.
Gunner with Invisible kitty

Gunner with Jojo the cat

All in all we report that Miss Amy is better then nothing.  Our humans seem to like her fine so that says something even though all humans are sorely lacking in judgement when it comes to visitors.  You should smell some of their guests…..